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The infinite games we play: In relationships, with employers, school, institutions, politics, and more, and more, and more. I have no patience and no will to play these games anymore; these games with no finite rules.

It's dizzying with the whirlwind of lies. I've been a participant in these games all my life, what happens if I stop? Is it ever possible to completely stop?

The truth is all a little too painful to address--to oneself or to others. But it must be said, well no, it needn't, but for me I want to. It's all a bit too much sometimes; being completely honest, I am sometimes morose, and who wants Miss Melancholy crashing their party, eh?

I must admit, I have, and often do, suppress my concern, and yes, sadness, when surrounded by a group whose only intent is to enjoy their life. So yet again, I play the game. If I projected how I really feel underneath, most would be uncomfortable and slowly, with as much social etiquette as possible, walk away. It's not even a sadness of self, it is a concern for the world and my uncertainty as to how I, one person amongst billions, can help.

I do little things for people that I know conjure feelings of happiness, though I may not agree with how it was brought. I do like to see people happy, I just wish in turn they would do something for another to invoke happiness. It's always about 'me, me, me.' My eyes well just looking out the window as cars travel; admittedly, new vehicles are much more comfortable in comparison to my almost 12-year-old truck, but they are still a waste. How silly is it to base one's position, one's status, one's standing, on the vehicle driven? How silly is it to spend so much money on one item that gives no return?

Oh, the games we play.

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